What people are saying about The Scallion:
“The Scallion owes me money!” – Robert Jenkes, Evanston, IL
“Where’s the Sudoku? – Susan Kramer, Little Rock, AK
“The Scallion is a haiku on steroids!” – Brian Samuelson, Laredo, TX
“Reading The Scallion gave me straighter, whiter teeth and removed all my unwanted body hair!” – Ted Northrop, Durham, NH
“I never thought those stories I read in The Scallion were true until one day it happened to me.” – Philip Scott, Tampa, FL
“Typo on page 24: ‘ass-hole’ isn’t hyphenated, assholes.” – Ken Franklin, La Jolla, CA
“The Scallion’s 'All You Can Read' happy hour specials are the best deals in town.” – Beth Wilkes, Milwaukee, WI
“I see you have plenty of time to waste on all this interweb nonsense, but you can’t spare a minute to pick up the phone and call your mother?” – Edith Scallion, Norwalk, CT
“I’m worth a shitload more than The Scallion.” – D. Trump, New York, NY
“Give me The Scallion or give me death!” – Steven Vicks, Montpelier, VT
The Scallion occasionally deigns to read comments from the unwashed masses. Send your ill-formed thoughts, sanctimonious screeds, and rambling manifestoes in a self-addressed stamped envelope to shout@thescallion.org. We regret we cannot validate parking tickets or redeem store coupons.
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